The longer that we walk with the Lord, the more clarity we gain. We gain clarity in knowing Him, His Word, His ways; and we also gain clarity into our unique issues. There are often a few, key root issues that cause major problems in our lives. One of those issues is control. The Lord is providing me much clarity into my relationship with control. I pray this article provides the insight needed to help you with overcoming control issues.
Control issues run deep.
The thing about control issues is that it’s not about the issue at hand. It feels like it is, but it’s not. Like many issues, anger being another common one, the anger issue isn’t about the offense. The offense is just what’s exposing the hidden anger within. Our heart issues lie dormant until provoked. This is why it’s key for us to express our truest heart’s desires and issues with the Lord.
He knows about them anyway. Acknowledging them is the first step in overcoming.
As we acknowledge what He allows us to see, it will humble us. It may hurt, but we must accept this as part of the growing process. True growth is not pretty. It will get hard before it gets easier. This is the case with all growth. The hardest part about change and overcoming is simply coming face to face with our real issues.
Overcoming control issues requires humility.
As God walks us through overcoming control issues, we must remain humble. It will require humility to accept what He shows us, and we must remain humble to respond the right way when the desire to control is triggered.
Daily, the desire to control will rise up.
The key is to pay attention to our triggers and tendencies so we can gan insight into our control patterns. When is your desire to control the strongest? What feelings arise when you can’t control? Ultimately, we want to grow to identifying: Why do I want to control?
These questions will not only provide clarity, but they will also prepare us for future situations. The more that we understand our control issues, the easier it becomes to change our response. For instance, as I was praying about control this morning, I realized that an antidote for me is trust. The Lord will walk us through our unique process.
For others, the antidote might be patience. Understanding that control issues run deep will prepare us to walk through our journey. Often, our control issues are linked to our past. Past hurts, situations, and experiences often leave us wounded and traumatized- whether we realize it or not.
We live in a ‘shake it off and move on‘ type of society, and so most often we do just that, without fully addressing the issues and wounds of our heart. Those unchecked and unresolved hurts often lead to our controlling ways.
These are the ways that the Lord desires to uproot. Controlling and manipulating our way through life is not truly living. Christ died that we may live abundant lives of faith, trust, and love. Control blocks these fruits from abiding.
Control hinders healthy relationships.
The quality of our relationships will determine the quality of the life that we live. If you find yourself in continuous cycles of unhealthy relationships, or you constantly experience stress and strife in your relationships, there could very well be control issues at play.
When you struggle with control issues, you tend to find it difficult to just be. You’re often on edge and easily agitated and frustrated. As we relinquish control and begin walking more in faith and trust, we’ll find that we will experience more peace and rest.
If you identify with this and are currently working through control issues, I pray that this provides you the inspiration needed to know that you are not alone, and that you can overcome. With God, it doesn’t matter where we’ve come from or what we’ve done. It simply matters that we begin trusting Him now.
As we do, He will empower us to overcome control issues. It will be a journey, like all growth, but He will provide the understanding needed to see it for what it is, as opposed to accepting it as a way of life. With God, we can overcome control issues, and live free, happy, healthy lives.
In Jesus’ name. Amen.
With love,
