Anger is an issue that many of us deal with today. I say us, as God has brought me a mighty long way as it relates to the emotion of anger, and He continues to provide insight. In this post ANGER MANAGEMENT 101, I’m going to propose that calm is the goal.
If you have an anger issue, the first thing you have to understand is that calm is the goal.
Anger is destructive, dangerous, and flat-out unproductive. So, in order to grow in managing anger, you must first see it for what it is. Consider this:
How are you when you are angry?
Really take the time to answer this. Be honest. Write it down. Gain a clear picture of what anger does to you, how it makes you feel, and what it leads you to do. In order to grow, we must really understand the need for growth. We have to be honest and see the need for anger management.
Secondly, you must understand why calm is the goal.
Calm is related to peace, stillness, quietness. Merriam Webster defines calm as a state of tranquility. Synonyms for calm as adjective include: collected, composed, coolheaded, together, untroubled, unshaken. Whew! I don’t know about you, but just writing those words excited me.
Can you picture yourself remaining calm, composed, and collected in the face of disturbances?
As Christians, it is possible and it is our aim. When we study the life and way of Jesus, this is what He perfectly demonstrates for us. He was not quick to anger, but rather He brought peace to chaotic situations. His Spirit dwells in us, so though it may seem impossible now, we also have the ability to bring calm to chaos.
Consider Jesus in the passage Mark 4:35-41, when He calmed the storm. Also, Psalm 46:10a when we are commanded to:
“Be still, and know that I am God:”
This scripture has probably been my scripture of the summer. Not only has it been providing rest for my mind and soul, but even now I see it as an antidote for anger. You see, anger is often a display of wanting control. We want to control and we can’t so we get angry.
No doubt, there are many roots that cause us to struggle with anger, and this is sure one of them. Other root causes for anger could be: insecurity, pride, impatience, or even fear. God has no problem showing us the root and then providing the antidote for whatever our issue is. It’s all in His Word. He’s covered it all. We just have to be honest. We must see the problem, as well as the need for change.
Once you acknowledge that you have an anger issue, God will graciously walk you through the entire process.
The final step in anger management is staying focused.
Once you understand that this is an issue for you, stay focused on overcoming it. Work on controlling anger and not letting it control you. We must be intentional to not miss this, or else we’ll just be running in circles distracted by all of life’s imperfections that will continually trigger us to anger.
Listen: Life is imperfect.
We all have imperfections that we’re facing. It’s life. The key is in maturing how we respond to them, and we have to know that anger is not the answer. Anger is outrageous [Proverbs 27:4].
When overcoming anger issues, we must begin by acknowledging that anger is not the answer. When it inevitably arises, instead of giving in to it, we must use all of our energy on controlling it. Subduing it. Then, God will enable us to calmly address the situation at hand- Not tainted by the unruly emotion of anger.
Remember, calm is the goal.
