Marriage is about friendship

Last night after the kids were sleep, my husband and I just talked.

We sat at the dining room table and just talked.  He talked and I listened, and I talked and he intently listened.  This was not one of those fast-paced, eager to speak conversations, but it was one of those I’m just happy to be here with you talking type of conversations.

It was good.  It was just us.  It was a moment of us building our friendship.  It reminded me that although marriage is about so many things (love, Christ, parenting, partnership, intimacy, business), that friendship is the core.

Are you friends with your spouse?  Do you envision being friends with your spouse?

I remember before I was married I didn’t spend a lot of time pondering the fact that my husband would be my friend.  I just pictured him being my husband, but I’m learning that marriage is about friendship.

My husband needs me to be his friend.  I need my husband to be my friend.  So often, us women think that our husbands need us walking behind them telling them what to do.  I get it, we think we’re smarter and all that (Lord, help us to respect and accept our differences), but really our husbands just need us to love them, listen to them, support them, encourage them.

They need us to be their friend.  Marriage is about friendship.

A marriage should be a safe place.  A place where we can be us, where we can express without judgment, where we can be honest about our vulnerabilities without fear of criticism.  We need to be able to be us in our marriage.  No faking.

Do you create an environment for your spouse to just be them?  Are you a good friend to your spouse?

Outside of our relationship with Christ, our marriage is our most important relationship.  Top priority.

I encourage you today: Focus on being a good friend to your spouse.

“Whoso findeth a wife findeth a good thing, and obtaineth favour of the Lord.”  – Proverbs 18:22

Does your husband feel like he’s found a good thing in you?

Be his friend and know that your husband has obtained favor of the Lord because he has you.  You don’t have to do everything- just be his friend.

Marriage is about friendship.


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