I don’t think we always understand how HUGE it is to have someone’s child. Our culture has told us that it’s okay to have children outside of wedlock, and although it certainly happens, it should never be our goal.
Having kids with someone keeps you CONNECTED to them, even when you’d like to disconnect the relationship. When you have kids with someone they are entitled to a certain level of knowledge about your life that they probably wouldn’t have if you didn’t have a kid(s) together.
It’s important to remember that if you are no longer with the kid’s mother or father then there is a reason why. If they had your complete best interest at heart you’d probably still be with them. So, if they didn’t have it then why would they have it now that you are no longer together? For this reason it is very wise to limit the information that you share with that individual. It may be wise to be cordial- NOT personal.
We’ve all seen or heard of situations where the parent may manipulate the child in an attempt to hurt the other parent. This MANIPULATION comes in many forms. One parent may subtly criticize one parent, or even hype themselves up as a way of making themselves appear better than the other parent.
These are just a few issues when it comes to baby momma/baby daddy relationships. (Ugh, you guys know I dislike those terms.) We just have to be WISE when it comes to decision making and managing those relationships if we are currently in those positions.
I think one of the most important things to do is to turn from negativity. Never put energy into situations that are obviously negative and unfruitful. Unfortunately, as tough as it is you may have to IGNORE a lot. But the benefit of this is that you will have tons of energy to put into things that will bring you back good fruit.
Secondly, pray. Pray for strength, wisdom, and understanding. Pray that the Lord will guide you and go to Him so that you can keep your heart pure. You don’t want to be overcome by evil, but rather overcome evil with GOOD. It’s not easy but oh so necessary if you want your household to be successful.