Our success in love and relationships greatly depends on the approach we take. We often let our emotions and our perspectives lead us, but honestly we should let the best APPROACH lead us.
Most of us always base discussions on how WE see it, or how WE feel; and while those are definitely important factors we must also consider the other people involved. We have to stay open-minded. We should assess the situation, acknowledge how we feel, consider the other person, then think through the best approach the resolve the situation.
I know it sounds complicated, but it will bring us back much better results! We may not get it right every time, but we should definitely give it a try. We should think less about our perspective, and think more about the most effective way of handling the issue at hand.
Everyone is different and everyone has different filters in their mind. So, instead of assuming or attacking a person when you have an issue, maybe try posing a question. This way the person gets engaged and they won’t immediately feel attacked. Also, it’s wise to never tell a person why they did something that they did. Honestly, we really don’t know their full train of thinking, we only know how WE felt or how WE saw it.
I learned in a leadership position to never point the finger, but to let the person know how they made you feel. If you are in a relationship then they should care about your feelings and most likely they are not intending to hurt you. Don’t let your feelings lead you down a path of making the issue bigger than what it is. Stay on track during the conversation and don’t create other issues that aren’t relevant. Stay focused.
I’m learning that relationships are all about problem-solving. There are bound to be problems, expect them, just be focused on solving them in the most effective way possible.
Have trust in your partner and try not to overreact. Learn each other as you go, so problems are solved easier the next time. And again, focus on your approach.
Success is all in the approach.